“Jesus in Drag”: wherein a straight man “comes out” to his family for a social experiment

This is actually fascinating. An author decides to truly experience what it is to be gay by “coming out” to his friends, family, and everyone around him, despite not being so.  The book this was done for should prove an incredible read.

What was the most eye-opening part of your year living with the label of gay?

Surprisingly the most eye-opening aspect of my year was experiencing just how detrimental the closet is. When I came out as gay, I was going into the closet as a straight man, and the repression and isolation I experienced was crushing. The combination of knowing I had to constantly hide my true attractions and orientation, with the reality that I couldn’t even hope for the possibility having a relationship, was overwhelming. And what I went through is NOTHING compared to the experience of the average gay and lesbian. They were never able to say “only 12 or eight or six more months of this before I get to be me again.” So what I consider to be the most eye-opening facet of my year was really only a glimpse of how bad the closet really is.

Hard to put it better than that. Not to mention that his closet was one of his own doing, rather than one forced upon him by fear that festered into self-hatred.

And massive kudos go to George Elerick himself. The amount of courage it must have taken to embark on this goes beyond anything you or I will ever muster up unless we save some babies from a burning grenade factory on our way to Beirut.

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3 responses to ““Jesus in Drag”: wherein a straight man “comes out” to his family for a social experiment

  1. It’s interesting to see this after just seeing on Gawker that Josh Weed has come out as a happily married gay man who has chosen to ignore his sexual orientation because he wanted children that were biologically his own and so that he could meet Mormon expectations . He has every right to make that life choice and the same right to come out as any other gay person. I’ve always enjoyed his blog, and he seems like a thoroughly wonderful person. However, the right will be all over this as a fine example of how, if they’re motivated, gays can just suck it up (that may be a poor choice of cliche) and walk it off when they feel attracted to their own sex.  Sigh.

    http://www.joshweed.com/2012/06/club-unicorn-in-which-i-come-out-of.html

    • I’d have to read about him before saying much, but the fact he’s gay in a straight marriage isn’t so odd; lots of gay people over time have done it due to society (in this case his Religious faith). 

      It’s too bad his experience might tarnish things for gays, but on the other hand, how does his wife feel?  And another question I’d wonder is just because one gay’s done it and is “happy”, doesn’t mean they all would be and I know some people just can’t handle the thought of being in a straight relationship.  I know one gay guy who actually said “What’s to like about gobs of fat and flesh”, aka breasts.  Pretty frank about his thoughts considering he was around women at the time (maybe brave too :P).

      Point is, I suppose if a heterosexual idiot points this out, then the gay could come back with “So you would be good with marrying someone who’s gay just to fulfill X need?”  I doubt the answer would be yes.

      • Hi Keth
        It’s worth a read. His wife and he both contribute to the post and explain their early-on reservations about the relationship.

        I’ve done a lot of transcription, and most of my clientele were gay or lesbian, so I know that some gay people live as straights. My first thought was that he was bisexual with a preference for men, but attracted to women if need be. He says in his post that’s not the case. He is attracted to men, not women, but has been able to make it work because he figured the trade-off was worth it. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I can’t help but wonder how this will play out as he ages and the kids are grown and it’s not quite as easy as it once was to perform sex with someone you’re not aroused by. Although, by that same token, there are many straight marriages where sex becomes non-existent and the couple stay together.

        It really is a fascinating read because you can tell they are both deeply committed to each other and love each other very much.

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